Doctor’s Visit

Row row row your boat…
Haha we are trying to navigate the flooding streets of Houston on our way back from the doctor’s office. We need the rain, but this is crazy!!

Dr. C was very supportive. He, of course, laid out our “options” (our non-options because the only option is to continue). He pointed out that many parents chose to terminate because they are afraid of what will become of their child when they are no longer around. That’s legit. I understand but it changes nothing for us.
Once I let him know we were keeping our son, he moved on.

-I am not high risk, you are precious and Dr. C will do everything in his power to treat me as such.

-There is apparently no way to know what T21 he has at this point.

-No reason to meet with a genetic counselor or DS clinic right now but possibly later. Still waiting for the full amnio results to come back. Maybe need to discuss this further with my MFM doc.

-Stillbirth and preterm labor are not concerns. I am on progesterone injections and have no perterm labor warning signs. I will be seen every other week and treated as a normal pregnancy. Should a stillbirth occur, it won’t be due to an unhealthy pregnancy.

-Fetal echo is being scheduled. Tyroid and gluclose are also being set up.

-NST will begin at 30 weeks when needed.

-I do not need to register with the hospital right now. Dr. C will make them aware of our situation when the time comes.

-Dr. C gave me the number of another women who’s son he delivered with DS to connect with 🙂

-We have the green light for TTC as soon as we feel ready after the baby gets here.

-Based on everything he can see, this is a normal pregnancy with “something extra”. Baby boy is healthy and everything looks good right now.

So that went very well! MJ did our ultrasound and we got a bunch of grainy pictures. We saw his little nose and eyes. He was waving and turned his head to say “hi”!

The two dark spots are his little eyes looking right at us! He even waved 🙂

This second one is a profile view, the small oval near the top of his head is his little hand.

I read “Welcome to Holland” (plus the extended version) last night and I can say that I feel very much the way it describes. Since we have no baby to hold, no way of knowing what the future really holds, and since DS is still such an abstract concept…well its difficult to be strong all the time. Waves of fear and sadness still rear their ugly head but more of the time I am happy and anticipating his arrival.

We plan to stay out in this nasty weather to go look at nursery bedding and ideas. I kind of like a new bedding set at PBK and I want to see it in person.

So I guess that is it for now! We got a lot done and I’m feeling pretty darn good right now. 🙂


9 Replies to “Doctor’s Visit”

  1. Sending love from Blessed by Beau!

    I’m a VERY proud Auntie of Beau. Alaina is my twin sister. As she has gone down the road you are about to travel, I was right there with her. Please know that it’s okay to feel sad. You have to grieve that “perfect” child you imagined to make room for all the love this one is going to fulfill. Beau has been such a blessing to our family and we love him unconditionally. You’ll see how much your little guy touches other people’s lives. It’s amazing.

    I can also relate to your other aspect of infertility as well. My husband and I have been down this road for a least 6 years with two failed IVF treatments, but still unsuccessful. I can’t wait to watch your family grow. Your going to be amazed at how much you can love.

    Much love!

    Maria Adams

    1. Maria,
      Thank you so much for posting, I really appreciate that. My family will be encouraged to hear your story from the Aunt-perspective. 🙂

      As for your IVF cycles, I will be praying for you and your family. I know how difficult it can and how stressful IVF is. IVF is sometimes just the way we use to build our families, but as I am sure you know, it can take multiple cycles before you see that big fat positive! The anxiety and fear that comes from trying to conceive is something all together different that few can relate to. I’m sure you know already, but there are TONS if support groups out there that are awesome (my favorite is IVF Buddies on facebook).
      What I will say is that after years of struggling and trying, nearly all the women from my groups are pregnant or have begun their family through different means.
      Welcome, fellow IF’er!! 🙂


  2. Thank you for stopping by my blog. It has become difficult lately to keep it up because we are so busy. I am trying to do better. I will be praying for you and your sweet baby. I know this is hard. It was four years ago for me when we received that diagnosis but it feels like just yesterday in some ways, and in other ways it is a world away.

    I have to echo Beau’s aunt above that it is ok to grieve and feel sad and that is a process that you most go through. But you will be blown away by your little boy when he gets here and although your life will be different it will still be awesome. I could go on and on but I won’t…just know that I will be praying for you! I look forward to reading your blog and going on this journey with you! If you ever need a “real” person to talk to, you can email me and I can give you my number and we can talk. anytime!!

    take care!!

  3. Sometimes I still get a little overwhelmed reading “Welcome to Holland”. It’s been 2 1/2 years and the part that says “and that grief will never ever go away” still creates a heavy sigh in me. I’m not sad anymore, just alittle overwhelmed at what life will be like when Gabe is in elementary school and past the “cute phase”? Will he have lots of friends in high school? Will he be able to live on his own? I am becoming more and more confident that everything will be just fine. Now that I have a daughter without DS, I find myself asking the same questions about her. I think it’s a normal thing for every parent to wonder. If I just focus on Gabe himself and not the stereotype or stigma, everything seems very manageable and fun.
    Welcome to the community! Michelle (from Cincinnati…too bad you beat our Bengals)

    1. 😉 haha my hubby is very happy about that win for sure!

      I agree, Michelle, I think the idea of this adorable little guy coming into my life isn’t as overwhelming as the idea of what he may be up against. I’m afriad that he won’t have friends, or that he won’t be able to live on his own and take care of himself. Like you said, the “cute phase”…

      I’m an elementary school teacher and I will say that at that stage kids can still be cruel but they are so much more accepting rather than not. It’s after that…

      Michelle, I am looking at your blog. Both of your children are beautiful!!!

  4. HI Ashley,
    Doesn’t it feel good to have a sense that you know even a little bit about where you are going in all this. 🙂 Don’t feel bad about the “waves of fear and sadness”. While you still have your precious wee man, you have lost a dream, and for most of us, when a baby is passed into our arms we actually embrace, not just that little one, but all our dreams and hopes and ideas of what he or she will do and be. When we find out that our little one has DS, it’s like we lose all that, and have nothing to replace it with except unknowns. And so it is natural to grieve. It doesn’t mean you are ungrateful for your wee man, or that you value him less. You’re just working through the process of giving up some expectations and learning what your new ones may be. (And when that’s done, our kiddies with DS are just like our other kids who blow our expectations out of the water and do different things anyway! 🙂 ) Allow the “waves” to draw you closer to our God of comfort, and keep being comforted by others who have been comforted by HIm.
    Continuing to pray for you all,
    Ruth in NZ

    1. Thank you so much, Ruth. Your are very right, and I guess that is the difficult part- waiting for 19 more weeks to hold him and know that it really will be ok. Right now it’s just such an abstract idea. But I feel as if I am growing stronger every day. 🙂

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