Eli had his first day of PPCD. If you must know, I didn’t cry until I picked him up. Dropping him off was like any other day. Because he started school with only 6 weeks remaining in the school year, I didn’t get the experience of walking him back to his room and talking with his teacher. I sat in the car rider line like every other parent (I’m a real mom now, I’ve decided- I’ve leveled up!), I dropped him off and didn’t look back.
But picking him up? That was different. The three hours he was gone, I thought of nothing but him. What he was thinking and experiencing. I grappled with the trust I had just given to these strangers. I had handed them my best three year old. That’s a little scary.
I sat in the line anxious and excited to get him back. He walked out of the building holding his teachers hand, back pack on his back and a smile on his face. I was so proud in the moment that I couldn’t help but weep. He’s so great. Adaptable and flexible. He’s eager to learn and wants to know more about the world around him. He really embraced the change and has been thriving there ever since.
As much as I hate to admit it, starting him (even with only 6 weeks of school remaining), has been the best thing we could have done. His ARD went so smooth, it was scary. We hired an advocate to help interpret and bring a sense of protection over the situation. I felt safer with her there and and more able to focus on interpreting the ARD paperwork instead of worrying that I would miss something or get tricked into something that isn’t in Eli’s best interest. And the best part? Eli actually looks forward to going and I get more time with just Wyatt and Ruby. It was the right move.
The staff at his school has been very supportive. He’s currently receiving PT, OT and SLP while attending PPCD. Here are some important take always from my first meeting:
1- Hire an advocate.
I would highly recommend hiring an advocate from the very beginning. Most people only look into one once there are problems but I say start with the best and get the best. I felt protected and safe with someone who knew the law. I could focus on what was being offered and going over paperwork instead of stressing over laws I don’t understand.
2- Have a pre ARD.
I requested Eli’s paperwork prior to the ARD. I went over it with a fine tooth comb with my husband. Then I went over it again with my advocate. From there, we contacted the coordinator to let her know our talking points and concerns. We were able to resolve issues outside of the ARD so those changes would then be reflected on the new paperwork instead of arguing over issues at the meeting. It helped me feel more prepared too.
3- Ask questions.
If you don’t understand something, ask! It’s that simple. You’re adding a lot of new terminology to your already busting special needs terminology. Just ask. It’s easier that way.
4- Make sure goals are attainable.
You will see the goals outlined by the school and based on what they are offering (push for as much as you think your child needs. READ that evaluation!) make sure that the long term goal is reasonable as well as the short term goals to get your child there. It’s a lot of think about- will Eli be able to complete 20% of this task in 6 weeks? I’m not sure, but ask. What do they normally see? How do we adjust this goal? How to we measure progress? Are there other ways to assess his success?
5- Relax and trust them!
That’s been the hardest one for me. I would say this is an emerging skill ;) but you have to give them something. They are the ones who have been charged with taking care of your child. Instead of focusing on the negative stories all over Google, focus one what you actually see. Eli’s principal actually pushed for even more therapies than what we had lined up (and we were perfectly happy with what was being offered!), his teachers seem to genuinely care and the whole front office staff already knows who he is. PPCD *is* a gift and I have to give them some trust or Eli will never get these valuable experiences. Will we have some negative experiences? Yeah probably. But isn’t that part of life anyway? I can be their friend until we aren’t anymore and then we will already have support in place to address issues.
With only 13 school days remaining, I’m actually sad to see it end. He brings home work every day, he’s always got the sign of some kind of craft experience on his person (paint or markers or glue!- he participated and made something. That makes my mama heart happy), and he really likes it. Our lives are busier and our mornings are more of a hustle and bustle but this is good for all of us. Looking forward to our new partnership and growing together.
For more ideas, IEP and Educational ideas, check out: https://www.pinterest.com/1213rockinmoms/iep-and-educational-information/